For a long time, I had this dream. This crazy dream…That I would have a book of mine published. Traditionally published by someone else, not me.
Well, this year it finally happened.
Alien Buddha Press picked up and published “The Book of Hours” a collection of 24 of my Dark Cosmic poems. Since about…high school (Senior year or so) I have always thought how great it would be if a book I wrote could be up on the bookshelves in some bookstore or library. That, in some small way, I could finally join all my heroes up there on the shelf. And this year, it happened.
But of course, it didn’t come through exactly the way I always imagined it. Originally, I never wanted to write poems. But something changed during the pandemic, poems started coming out of me (beginning with “The King Becomes a Star”), I got encouragement and acceptances, and I headed more and more in that direction. I compiled a good, seaworthy 40 poems or so and I asked around at StokerCon (the Horror Writers Association’s annual convention), heard about ABP, sent in some poems, and, well, here we are.
It’s funny because at the start of this year, while I wouldn’t say I was on the verge of quitting, I was very much on the verge of “meh” about writing. Why?
Because it seemed like I was doing everything right. Checking all those little boxes, you know? …I was producing words, I was editing, I was finishing poems/stories, I was submitting them. I have this Blog, a newsletter, I was going to conventions, going to Poetry Open Mics. But nothing was sticking. I was getting rejection, after rejection, after rejection. And I was receiving little traction or notice elsewhere that I could see…
Which all added up to…me telling myself a little too often: “Why am I doing this? What’s the point? Is all this work for nothing? Couldn’t I find a better way to spend my weekends? And some of my nights? Something? Anything?”
Well, just then, at that darkest moment, I got an invite to be on a panel at StokerCon. I had never been on a panel at a convention before! Bam! That was a huge shot in the arm. In the meantime, in truth, I hadn’t given up. I was still submitting, still writing, still editing. But somehow I was more energized (the NerdWife said I was “vibrating” when I got the news about the panel, bless her). And a month or so after that I started getting an acceptance here, an acceptance there, things trickling in. Things started looking up, and I went into that StokerCon convention with a positive outlook, met more people, asked around, and found the connection to Alien Buddha Press.
So, what’s the lesson here?
It’s trite, but true: Don’t give up.
That’s it. Keep going. Keep focusing on what you can control (Thanks, Epictetus and Ryan Holiday) and let the rest go. Create your art. Write your poems. Put in the early morning workout. Work a little later than usual at your day job. But whatever you do, do NOT give up. And one day, all those gears you have set in motion, will start to engage, will start to grind together. The things you’ve sent up will engage in some sort of forward movement. I can’t guarantee what kind, but it will give you at least something. That’s what I’ve learned this year. It was a hard-earned lesson.
As such, and since it’s sort of my thing, I’d like to run down some of my writing “firsts” this year. It’s quite a long list.
But before we do that, I want to thank all of YOU for reading this Blog all over the world (it’s getting a lot more attention globally this year, BTW), for reading my book, for leaving reviews of the book, for coming out to Poetry Open Mics (even in the middle of a snowstorm), and for generally being all-around good folks and awesome supporters and fans on this crazy journey. Art, books, and literature never occur in a vacuum—moments and places in time tend to get the sort of art they deserve, the art they promote and boost with their eyeballs, their reviews, their discussion and their dollars. Without this artistic ecosystem, all that great stuff simply wouldn’t exist. We’d live in colorless world. So, thanks for the support.
OK, back to my writing firsts for this year:
First book acceptance! A book of my poems “The Book of Hours” was accepted for publication by Alien Buddha Press. A small, but life-altering event.
First book published! Sept. 16 “The Book of Hours” became available worldwide from Amazon and me! (Self-Promo Break: Yes, you can order the book from me directly. Just DM me here, on Facebook, or IG and I will send you a signed copy. I ship almost anywhere worldwide.).
First time headlining an event: I was the featured poet at the Del Ray Poetry Open Mic at St. Elmo’s here in Alexandria on Dec. 5. I did about 30 minutes of my poems, about 14 pieces in total, with four debut poems. It was the first time I had been the “featured” anything at an event. And there was a great turnout despite the dusting of snow. The audio from the event is on my About page now.
First time participating on a panel at a Convention: I participated onThe Cosmic Horror panel at StokerCon this year. I was so nervous—John Langan was on the panel! My fellow panelists were great and super welcoming and in the end, I had a great time. Any other year, this would have been the top highlight of my writing year.
First Book Signing! I had three signings at local Barnes & Noble locations in Northern Virginia. It was a great thrill to sit at a table with my name on a placard, sign copies of my book, banter with customers, and hand them some giveaways. I felt like a real writer. I was also able to sell some copies of my book at the poetry Open Mic Nights.
First non-fiction piece published. I took a minor detour into non-fiction and satire with“A Modest Defense of Trick or Treating” which appeared October 25 on the HWA Blog. I found non-fiction a bit more stress-inducing than fiction. You can really hide behind fictious worlds in a way you can’t with nonfiction. You’re really owning your words in a different way.
First acceptance as a guest at a Convention. Well, here’s some late-breaking news…And something I can’t really give away completely yet. I will be appearing as a “guest” at a local convention for the first time early next year. That means that instead of just coming as a participant, I get to wear a little special badge, appear on multiple panels, do a signing, and maybe even teach a class. Essentially, you go from being in the audience to getting up on stage. Another little step along the way. More on this when I get the final greenlight to share from the organizers.
First time appearing in a Year-End “Best of” Collection. My poem “The Darkness” appeared in The Alien Buddha’s Best of 2025. I have always like this poem. True story: It was inspired by the milling crowds of the Las Vegas Strip. It was a nice honor!
Other new developments this year:
Besides these “firsts,” there were other new developments this year. Overall, I had three poems and one story published. Here’s a breakdown:
- The poem “Celestial Worm” appeared in Star*Line Magazine. It’s one of my favorite recent pieces about the resonance between an earthly and a celestial worm.
- “Shine Back” and “The Power in the Darkness” debuted in Alien Buddha’s October Round Up.
- “Turtles,” a piece of Horror flash fiction, starring a fanatic and a supercomputer was published in Timber Ghost Press in February.
- I also had two new poems accepted: “The Point” will appear soon in Strange Horizons and “Chopin” will be in Star*Line Magazine.
- I appeared, again, at the Baltimore Book Festival on the SFWA Stage for a panel on the healing power of Horror literature. In short, I think that the trauma that Horror readers undergo second-hand through the lead protagonist in a Horror piece can come out—like them—stronger and more resilient.
Also new this year:
I also tried a few new things this year, just to stretch myself and see where I ended up. Here are some notable ones:
I’m Now on TikTok… Because, why not!? As you can see, I don’t quite know what to do with it yet. But I hope to figure it out. I have some ideas…
Proof of Concept: Taking Time Off to Write
In July/early August, I took a few days off not to vacation or laze about, but to write, just write. I wanted to see if I had the discipline to write and stay productive for five straight days. So, I took the time off from work. Would I have the discipline? The drive? The discipline? Well, here’s what I have to report…
In a word, yes. I kept at it, I produced each of those five days. And on the last, I broke through and wrote over 3,000 words—a lot for me.
I think this was a good experiment because it gave me the reassurance and the ability to see that if I ever do transition this to a full-time gig, I just might be able to do it, day after day.
Progress on Books
I kept adding words to a longer project that is very important to me. I should have a first draft soon. More on that later, I hope.
I Solidified my Poetry Process
This year, I feel I really solidified my process for creating poetry. I’ve had the basics for some time, but this year it became more stepwise and fluent.
Here the process…in three easy steps:
- I capture the poem and edit it half to death (if needed—not all poems need this—so come across cool and clear).
- I bring the still-raw poem to what I call the Florida Poets Group hosted by Crystal S— to do a first reading. I take careful notes of their thoughts.
- Finally, I perform the poem live for at Del Ray Poetry Open Mic for a real-time reaction.
Those three steps get me close to where I need to be with my poems. If a poem endures these three steps, it’s ready for submission.
I tweaked/improved my poetry SUBMISSION process..
This fall, I tried something new. Noting that most magazines have simultaneous submissions for poems, I perfected a tranche (group) of poems. Then, I sent them out first to a self-compiled “top tier” of challenging poetry markets/magazines. I waited to hear back from this tier, then I sent them off to a second tier of somewhat less challenging markets. I waited to get acceptances/rejections from this group, and then sent them to a final tier.
The strategy seemed to work since I got two acceptances using this method. I’m looking to replicated this “tranche” or “batch” method of sending out poems in the new year.
Well, that was a lot! If you’re still reading—thanks for hanging with me till the end.
I’m wishing you lots of re-energizing, low-key activities between the end of this year and the start of the next one. Lots of feasting and dozing off by the fire, basically. At least, that’s my plan!
Until next time. Keep reading, keep writing!
Darius
Inside the Writer's Mind 